It is impossible to commit a violent act and not harm yourself terribly. There is a price that must be paid for every protester-turned-rioter who smashes a window, loots a store, sets a car on fire or worse. That person will wake up the next morning and look in the mirror. Each of these people must live with what they have done and who they have become.

Imagine how you would feel if last night you looted a store, smashed a police car, or set a building on fire. I can’t even imagine living with this. If this is what you are going through, or if you are considering joining this movement, I want to speak to you directly.

You have been told that this destructive behavior is justified by the racism or violence of others. Those who have convinced you of this are not your friends. They knew beforehand the emotional and psychological impacts of what they have incited you to do. They have taken a sick pleasure in watching you destroying the property of your brothers and sisters, ruining the neighborhoods you grew up in, and inflicting great psychological and emotional harm on yourself.

Those who encourage such behavior or look the other way—the corporate media, the Democrats, the corporate funders of BLM, the sports commissioners condoning your movement—these people who pretend to be on your side have always been your enemies. Did you think that this magically changed?

They have incited you to toss out all the progress that has been made in the struggle for civil rights and equality, and you have foolishly accepted the bait. I know, it felt justified and sounded exciting to riot and loot; but in this ultimate act of ignorance, you are responsible for unleashing hell.

Every act of violence is harmful in every sense. Just like soldiers after a war, you will suffer from a sort of PTSD. You will turn to substances, will resort to violence as a response to every challenge, and will no longer be able to function in society as you fall deeply into poverty.

Those who are inciting or allowing violence through the Black Lives Matter movement are taking advantage of your human decency, your genuine aspiration for fairness, equality, and justice, and they are make fools of you as they stand by watching you destroy yourselves and your communities.

You have no true leaders because nobody is telling you the truth—that violence is no solution and offers no possibility of victory. That sickness in your stomach the morning after the riot, you and your entire community will have to live with that until you acknowledge life’s reality and make a fundamental correction.

There is a way out from this hell you have been bated into. The way out is true forgiveness—the full recognition of error and a letting it go. If you have committed any act of violence, there is a way to forgive yourself—though it is not going to be easy. You can find the love within and rediscover yourself as the good person you know you are. Eventually, you can forgive all those who have resorted to violence as a solution to anything (even the police, who are suffering in the same way as you).

Let go of violence and destruction. It offers only hell. The only way forward is through the thought system of love. This situation may feel hopeless right now—and it certainly is hopeless within the thought system of violence—but if you can openly recognize the fundamental error of violence, we will forgive you and we can all heal.