The absence of desire
For what profit is it to a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? (Matthew 16:26)

Better to walk in love than to fall in love

To fall in love is to believe that one special relationship can be your primary source of happiness—that the other person will be enough to complete you and to fulfil your every need as a man or woman. Even while almost everyone believes this, in practice it never quite works.

When two people fall in love, often the relationship starts to become a job. Your job is now to follow all the normal rules, to play a role, to do whatever it takes to make the other person happy, and to act as though any of this even works. Often, in a normal relationship, the price you must pay is the sacrifice of personal freedom, openness, and authenticity. You are expected to hide a huge dimension of your curiosity and deny the possibility of new experiences or growth beyond the relationship.

As wonderful as it is to spend your days together with that one special person, the price of falling is too high and the returns are too little. Better to walk in love than to fall.

By walking in love, I mean be who you are while practicing unconditional acceptance, total honesty and openness. It means loving yourself completely, telling the truth about everything, and then letting your perfect love flow to whoever reflects that love back to you most beautifully and purely. When another person also loves in this way and feels the same way about you, you have found a true treasure—a conscious, spiritually-alive love relationship. Such a relationship may or may not involve romance or sex and, whatever form this holy relationship may take, is never considered exclusive.

There is a different way to do relationships. This is the ongoing experience of love and passion that never fades, the uninterrupted flow of positive energy, the endless safety of mutual understanding and forgiveness, and the experience of transcending this world to awaken fully in perfect union. Relationship bliss isn’t found by falling; but, by walking together in love.