The problem is that you almost never say exactly what you mean.
You so rarely confess how you really feel. You are almost never open about what really excites you, what really bores you, and what you really want or would do if you were totally free.
Now consider the fact that nobody is telling you what they mean either. This has caused a detachment from reality.
You think that, by filtering what you do and say so that it is socially acceptable, you are gaining relationships and your life is going more smoothly. But by limiting your telling of the truth, you are limiting the life you were meant to live and teaching dishonesty to all.
To be honest and to tell the truth is the experience of true enjoyment.