If you have a strong need to change someone, it can only be that you don’t fit. Rather than trying to make a person fit who doesn’t, wouldn’t it be better to be with someone who does?

All relationship problems are caused by one person trying to change the other. From this flows the ugliness of judgment, argument and debate, withholding love or even violence. Push hard enough for change and your partner will become afraid of you, will lie, and even begin seeking more perfect love in the arms of another.

If you can’t accept someone unconditionally, then set that person free to find someone who does. You might love each other, but if you are trying to change or control one another then you are only causing harm and you should not be together exclusively.

When two people fit, they can fully be who they are and can share everything without any negative reactions or problems. No matter how good your intentions or how hard you try other ways and strategies, there is only one simple path toward lasting happiness in a relationship.

Start by agreeing on unconditional acceptance, freedom, and total honesty that goes both ways. Now, after practicing this for some time, if you are both being yourselves and there is no desire to change one another, then you belong together and you will be happy.

It is important that you now set no rules and simply continue forever in this way. You will experience deep fulfillment and a passion that will never fade. A romantic relationship can be a perfect friendship that is also a holy relationship. It takes time to find the right person, but it isn’t that complicated. We continue tomorrow and each day after that.