We seek happiness in a relationship with that one perfect man or woman. The dream is that there is someone out there who is meant for you, who fits you perfectly, and when you find this person then life is complete.

The dream is that salvation is to be found in the special relationship. The problem is that the dream becomes more important than the person.

“The ideal of the unholy relationship thus becomes one in which the reality of the other does not enter to spoil the dream; and the less the other really brings to the relationship, the better it becomes. Thus, the attempt at union becomes a way to exclude even the one with whom union is sought.” -A Course in Miracles

When two people form a special relationship, they make a deal. The deal is that both parties must separate themselves off from the world in order to become everything to each other. This comes with a set of rules and expectations that are so unrealistic that, to maintain the illusion, truth must be hidden.

The couple will stop at nothing: arguing, deceiving, making guilty, controlling and manipulating. In time, there is no love and no closeness – only resentment and loneliness. The disciplined few go on in this state of familiar misery until death – which is considered success in this world.

Perfect love is not possible within the special relationship. Salvation requires the knowing of what perfect love is, and how to love yourself. Love is total honesty, acceptance, and giving. When you know what love is, you hold no one hostage to cruelty and attack. In love, nobody is desperate and there need be no rules and no sacrifice. Be love and extend it to the world. We continue tomorrow and each day after that.