I was watching Queer Eye on Netflix last night (episode 4 To Gay or Not Too Gay) and realized...we need a way for straight people to come out of the closet too!
Coming out isn't just about sex or sexuality. Maybe it isn't even about being gay. Coming out is about being brave enough to be who you truly are. It's about not caring what people think. Coming out is about saying, "Hey Mom, hey Dad, this is who I am...I'm just gonna be me from now on...I'm gonna do things my way...I would like you to please try to accept me for who I am."
Coming out is about claiming freedom from the expectations of others. It is about designing your own life, doing things your way, loving who you want to love, following your own career path, maybe dropping out of college or going on a trip around the world, maybe choosing minimalism, exploring spirituality, alternative lifestyles, being who you truly and authentically are. How tragic it is that this most important ritual is only something homosexuals get to do!
Fuck that. It's time for everyone to come out of the closet. It's time to break from from social expectations, sexual norms, traditional male/female roles...it's time for you to be flamboyantly you!
Come out to the world. Stop living according to the expectations of others and start being true to your own intuition. What do you really think about monogamy? How do you feel about marriage? Parenting roles and expectations? Gender roles? Professional stereotypes? Cultural traditions? Political issues? Social issues? Why not openly state your truth and then begin to live it? Why not find your authentic voice, even if your friends and family don't get it?
If you continue living according to the expectations of others, that isn't freedom. Are you obeying the rules of your parents, or worse yet your husband or wife? Fuck that. Be true to who you are an what you know is true. Let the world adjust to fit you. Maybe you are afraid to express yourself creatively? Fuck that. Maybe you are tired of dressing a certain way, talking a certain way, making the same bullshit small-talk? Let it go.
Come out. Be proud. Be you. This is the most important of life's rituals, and it isn't something that should be reserved only for homosexuals. Now is the time for you to come out and be flamboyantly you.
Here's my coming out: I'm openly spiritual. I believe that love is unconditional or it isn't love. I'm polyamorous and think monogamy for life is a terrible idea. I will not be limited by the guilt and shame put on me by others. I truly do not care about judgments or opinions. I believe the universe is abundant and there's no reason to fear. I'm bored to death by small-talk and refuse to engage. I believe that it is possible to completely escape ego. I will write and sing what I want to and do business the way I want to. I will live where I want to live and be myself no matter what. I will love completely and love for life. I will parent according to my deepest human truths. That's a start.
Actually, I have come out of the closet many times over the years...and each time I have faced exactly what a homosexual might face. I've lost people for sure...but that is exactly what needed to happen for me to move forward.
We all need to come out because it is the only way to be free...the only way to be you.